I have been in psychotherapy for a while now. I have spent more than four years analyzing my childhood and I am still doing some of the work. For four years I was hardly able to focus on my everyday life at all. I was constantly struggling with very powerful emotions.
Now, even though I am not completely done with my past work, I am starting to see my present again. However, it is not anymore the old me, who sees the present, but it is the new me. Hence, some things just do not add up anymore. They really do not fit.
I have during the last half a year made some shocking discoveries. About myself, my life and the people in there. I have cut out few people and I am afraid that, there is still some change coming in my way. This is all rather challenging, considering that I am still struggling with my intense need for security.
All I can say about this feeling that I currently have is that ‘You wake up in a parallel universe. You notice that you are wearing shoes while you need to be wearing flippers. Your shirt feels too tight for the weird matter that surrounds you now instead of air……’ You are still you and it seems like the surroundings have changed and you have to remind yourself hard that, it is actually you who has changed.