People that are too “perfect”

There are people that always make you feel bad. I am talking about people that “have it all together”. Their life is a series of successes and they never fail to let you know about these. You keep comparing yourself with those people and you cannot help but to feel defeated- “less than something”, whatever it would be.

There is a chance, of course, that my reaction is due to my own inferiority complex. I am used to feeling like a failure. Still, I have a sense that some people are after making others feel inferior. They also keep comparing themselves with others and their success is complete only if they feel they have won over someone.

I used to look up to these people- I admired their achievements and wanted to be like them. I tried so hard to become and be one of those people, but at some moment realized, I will never be. I have always been slightly odd or unconventional. My life has been a struggle as I tried to fit in and fulfill all the societal norms. I still struggle, but my attitude to aforementioned people is also slowly changing.

I now think of them as, well, not someone you would want to keep around. If you feel constantly that your communication with someone is an endless struggle as to who has achieved more, to me there is no value to it. I like to have a possibility to open up and to say- well today I really screw up. No, not to say- my boss is a total asshole, but to say, sometimes I am a total asshole. Own my failures and mistakes without being made to feel so horrible about not being perfect.

So, I am trying my best to keep away from people who cannot admit that they are sad, ashamed or have failed. The chances are that everybody feels these things from time to time, so if they are not honest about it and furthermore respond to my openness with the statement that they have never had any problems, I feel they cannot accept the full spectrum of human experience. Furthermore, they cannot even be honest with themselves and are so mortified to show any vulnerability. If I want to see these kinds of people I will watch a Hollywood chick-flick, but from those around me I expect more acceptance and openness.

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